…I got a pre-declined credit card in the mail.

…CEO’s are now playing miniature golf.

…Exxon-Mobil laid off 25 Congressmen.

…My ATM gave me an IOU!

…I saw a Mormon polygamist with only one wife.

…I bought a toaster oven and my free gift with purchase was a bank.

…If the bank returns your check marked “Insufficient Funds,” you call them and ask if they meant you or them .

… Angelina Jolie adopted a child from America .

…Parents in Beverly Hills fired their nannies and learned their children’s names.

…My cousin had an exorcism but couldn’t afford to pay for it, and they re-possessed her!

…A truckload of Americans was caught sneaking into  Mexico  .

…Motel Six won’t leave the light on anymore.

…A picture is now only worth 200 words.

…They renamed Wall Street ”  Wal-Mart Street .”

…When Bill and Hillary travel together, they now have to share a room.

…The Treasure Island casino in  Las Vegas is now managed by Somali pirates.

…Congress says they are looking into this Bernard Madoff scandal. Oh Great! The guy who made $50 Billion disappear is being investigated by the people who made $1.5 Trillion disappear!